in the style of shashi

My coworker, who is from Maryland, and I, a native New Yorker, had been talking about my fear of dogs, and I noted that the fact that there are so many dog walkers in New York doesn’t qualm my fear by any means. She said she had never really seen dog walkers in Baltimore, and I agreed. But today, I saw three dog walkers. Who knew. 

After work, I waited for the shuttle in the rain for 40 minutes. I was so relieved when the bus finally came, and I found one of the last seats near the rear. The top was open, so I was rained on for the next 20 minutes. Sort of an FML moment for me.

Metaphors.

Beginning a trend of weekly metaphor-solving, we would like to know what you think this metaphor, written by Paul Eluard (seen photographed below), means: "La terre est bleue comme une orange." 

(translation: "The earth is blue like an orange.)

L'EXPLIQUEZ. 

FML

http://www.fmylife.com/

If you haven't already visited this site of so-called "everyday life stories" and believe yourself to be a miserable wreck, then get on it. You will indubitably take pleasure in the misery of others. Prime example: Today, I was presenting a powerpoint. As I plugged in the cord that connected my computer to the projector, I had forgotten what my boyfriend had set my desktop picture to the night before. I opened my laptop and projected on the wall was me nude. I go to Catholic school. FML. Having attended a Catholic school myself, I can affirm that her (I will assume a heterosexual relationship) life sucks. That is, unless you have a hot bod like the airbrushed models above. 

There are, naturally, more amusing, albeit less severe, posts as follows, which display the unconditional love between a parent and child: Today, while working on a medical school application, I asked my mom what she thought my greatest challenge in life had been. She replied : "Trying to lose your virginity." FML. Some students at a certain university in Bodymore, Murderland have undoubtedly experienced a similar response from their parents and will continue to do so for every school or job application they ever fill out.

The website also has two links for the convenience of the readers in determining whether, based on the severity of the post, the original poster's life really sucks - I agree, your life is f***ed - or if they indeed deserved it - you deserved that one. In my opinion, if you can't even get laid in Baltimore, where crack heads and sexual predators alike probably line the sketchy streets in anticipation of what goods the evening will bring, then yes, you deserved that one; on the other hand, you did choose to attend the university that you do, making your life incredibly f***ed, but not for long! You will go on to find incredible job opportunities, assuming the economy doesn't crash for the 283729847 time.

spinning wheel of death

 how much does it suck when macs think?

Cleptomania: Harmless Good Times or Diagnosable Disorder?

Sometimes stealing can be fun. Like when it's cereal or vodka or pillows or traffic cones...But when does playful cleptomania become dangerous, destructive, and able to ruin friendships?
Can it?

Cool or Just Immature?

A trend has swept the nation, or perhaps just college campuses. Things that were wicked cool when we were...oh say ages six through twelve, have come back in full force (at least for girls, that is). For some unexplicable reason (though we shall try to explicate the phenomenon) things such as leggings, Hello Kitty, high ponytails, princesses, and novelty jewelry are all extremely "cool."

Though this could be an examination of what is cool (a lengthy scrutiny that many real theorists have done before), we will instead look at the specific trends themselves.

Leggings. We wore them as children (maybe not with such a risque top). I definitely owned quite a few pairs of leggings for all occasions as a kid. But now they've made a comeback. Everywhere you look girls are wearing them. With a teeshirt, with a fancy top to go out in, with an oxford, etc. I myself have worn them with an oversized sweater or flannel shirt, but why? Is it the whole 80's revival that is taking over our fashion sense? Will we look back another 20 years from now and say, "What the fuck were we thinking?" I think we will. The amount of spandex that is deemed cool to wear in our everyday lives is absurd. And of course now it is completely acceptable, even admired, to own everything American Apparel sells, but I do believe that someday when we're looking back at our glory day photos, we'll be having some WTF moments too. Perhaps much of the coolness is in its irony. Do we actually think we look good in these absurdly bright and tight clothes? Maybe, maybe not. Maybe we all have great sense of humors and are just having fun...

Hello Kitty/Disney Princess/Other Infantile Games & Toys. Parties of these themes are frequently had and always enjoyed, especially by the girls dressing up for them. Do we simply miss our childhood? Is this a way for us to make up for our gone by youth?

To Be a Blogger

As we venture to become avid bloggers, we wanted to break down the blogging language for all those other newbies.

To Blog:
I blog.
You blog.
He/She/It blogs.
We blog.
You (plural) blog.
They blog.

Past: To have blogged

V-Day, 2/14

V-DAY: Victory Day, Virginity Day, or Valentine's Day?

Sleep on it.